A Plate Of Grapes

SPEW #1 comes from frequent spammer, 0nline Casin0. Apparantly, he really doesn’t like grapes filmed on fish shaped plates.

“It’s episodes like this that convinced me that there is no big white-haired guy in the sky looking out for his peeps. If he/she is out there, he/she doesn’t give a shit.”

Indeed… what kind of a supreme being would allow His creation this kind of cruel latitude?

The True Religion Outlet, which sounds like some 80’s synth band, posts:

“First come, first served.First impressions are half the battle.”

First off, knowing is half the battle, everyone knows that. Firster, this could actually be lyrics from a crappy 80’s band. Firstest,  are you saying that all that matters is being first in line?

Finally, we have Webcam Girl (you can imagine the type of site she’s pitching), she wants to comment on my envious career lines post.

“The loveseat was a torn and tattered light blue leather material. Often with thread in the same color as the foundation fabric.”

As the author of a popular website, I can appreciate well written prose. This spam, however, doesn’t qualify.

Our first post comes from “Rihanna Is The Only Girl In The World”. Seriously, that’s their name. Well, they wanted to comment on the aPlateOfGrapes exclusive story regarding monkeys stealing from prison guards.

“Hrmm that was weird, my comment got eaten. What I wanted to say was get two plants, and set both of them in two different locations. One plant should be put in a box with a light so it can grow. The other plant should be put in a dark box so it will not grow.”

First off, if there was a previous comment, it was spam and got deleted. Second, have you moved on to torturing small woodland creatures or pets? ‘Cause it sounds like you’re on the fast track.

Next we have Christy. She likes Popsicles. Also, you may note that Christy sounds kind of… manly.

“Magnificent goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff previous to and you’re just too magnificent. I actually like what you’ve acquired here. You make it enjoyable and you still care for to keep it sensible. I cant wait to read much more from you. This is actually a great web site.”

Thanks, I’m often told that my “goods” and “stuff” are magnificent. Also, I get the gist that you were a frequent visitor to my previous website. For those of you that remember, my last site was around about 12-15 years ago or so. It was just a flaming pumpkin. No, not that kind of flaming. It was just on fire. It’s also worth noting, I didn’t “acquire” the site, I created it from scratch. Amazingly, the domain name was available for purchase.

Lastly, we have HD video. He likes The Sea Captain.

“omg awsome looking game”

and followed that up by saying:

“do want more dlc”

What am I, BioWare? And, although there is a game about dropping grapes onto plates, I can’t confirm a The Sea Captain game is in development by aPlateOfGrapes or one of our divisions. If there is, I’ll be sure there’s lots of DLC… for a price, of course.